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Life is a highway called PANAM

By Dan Wallace - 2009-05-31

After a short ferry ride, Mike, Chris and I pedaled back onto mainland South America. Within two days we approached the city of Puerto Montt. This port city, about the size of Allentown, PA, had a few surprises in store for us, including a bee sting to the jugular for me and lots of goodies mailed down by friends and family back home for the group. Daniel also rejoined us after his time in Santiago. Puerto Montt will always be as remembered the location of the first One Road South McDonald’s Fest, where for almost two hours the guys and I binged on the greasy but oh-so-tasty fast food. We left town that same day and I spent the next day paying for it with the runs and severe stomach cramps. Next time, it’s BK.

Our ride up to Valdivia was fast and full of good times. Riding North on Route 5, part of the famous Pan-American Highway, we made a stop in Puerto Varas where we celebrated my birthday and were interviewed by the local journalist. Further North, we stopped off in the city of Osorno to stock up on food and check out the sites for a few hours. The next day, we exited the highway and headed Northwest through the mountains to Valdivia. We were all very excited to arrive in this town because, we knew our contact was a tour guide, so we figured our experience would be pretty cool.

Unfortunately, our contact thought we were arriving a few months in the future and was not prepared to host us. This wasn’t a huge problem since we had a backup contact, or so we thought. When we couldn’t get in touch with our backup, we had to evaluate our options, which we did while refueling on completos (loaded hot dogs) and papas fritas (French fries). While we ate our prayers were answered by a very considerate local who offered us his place for the night. We agreed and were soon following distant taillights through dark streets until we arrived at Ronny’s house. There may have been a few moments of thinking, “This guy is leading us to our doom”, since we had just met this man, but as we left the next morning alive and well, all such feelings were dead and buried.

Over the next few days, we found our church contacts and stayed with two different host families. Our new friends loved testing our Spanish and were thrilled to teach us some of the less-than-proper phrases and words. One day, we took a bus to visit an old Spanish fort, which may or may not have been entered illegally. Okay, so it was definitely closed. But couldn’t miss it. Even worse, after we scaled the “back entrance”, a few other groups of people did the same. Don’t people know NOT to follow a bad example?

Another notable mention was our wonderful time watching the most hideous animals we’ve yet encountered. In Spanish they are called “Lobos del Mar” which means “wolves of the sea.” In English we would refer to these creatures as sea lions, but never in my life have I seen sea lions as ugly as the ones that live in the river next to Valdivia. When I think of any animal similar to a seal, I think of something slim and cute with flippers and a big round nose for the beach ball. These massive slugs were none of that. They were blubbery, smelly, really, really ugly, plus they spat! In the water I’m sure the lobos are still ugly, but at least they probably look graceful. However, out on the poo covered docks, they resemble anything but a creature of grace and beauty. At first, I thought I was being too hard on them, until Chris got spat on. Watching Chris recoil in horror and run around screaming like a little girl confirmed my belief that these were the most unattractive animals I had ever laid eyes on.